Today was a good day ;-)

L'il Wil's Discount Warehouse: Black Market Technology

Everyone's favorite Attack of the Show character (or at least everyone's favorite black AOTS character) is back. That's right, it's time for L'il Wil's Discount Warehouse. This week I got to bang around three cool products: an awesome 23-inch LCD from ViewSonic, Casio's 5-megapixel EX-S500 digital camera, and a massive 500GB external hard drive from Seagate. Check the bullet points!

Madden Curse 2007?

Announcer: “Sean Alexander, you just made the cover of EA Sports' Madden NFL 2007. What are you gonna do now?”

Alexander: “I'm gonna spend the next season on the injured reserve."

Now in it's 17^th season, EA Sports' Madden series is one of the most successful franchises in video gaming history. Hell, back when I was the hardware editor at Ziff Davis' Computer Gaming World, I was known for uttering the blasphemous words, “Madden is the only game that's worth playing.”

Which brings us to the “curse.” Historically, John Madden appeared on the box. That said, since 2000, the game has featured a series of players. And every player who has appeared on the box has had an unsuccessful season following the release of the game. Oh, you don't believe me? Well, Wikipedia sure as hell does.

Needless to say, good luck Sean Alexander.

The segment that launched the world's dopest fucking blog: sort of...

Back in February I launched Designed to Expire: sort of. In fact, I created this blog back in like 2003, but it wasn't until this February that I actually felt compelled to begin posting. Anyway, the first post was about the Hercules DJ Console MK2, a $400 gadget that lets you mix MP3 and WMA files DJ-style. It's a really cool device. Anyway, I taped a segment for my show, “Attack of the Show,” where I DJ'd with it at Saints and Sinners, a bar in Culver City. Anyway, the package sat in the can for a while and eventually aired last week on everyone's favorite cable channel: G4. Anyway, for those of you who missed the segment when it aired, you can check it out here and watch as I “Move the Crowd.”

The Spirit of Truth

This is by far one of the dopest things I’ve ever seen. From way back in the ‘90s, some dude recorded this so-called “preacher” on public access television. The dude drops mad biblical science, replete with f-bombs a plenty.

Some choice quotes:

"I come in the name of Jesus, biotch."

"You trust in Hell motherfucker. I trust in heaven, and I’m already there motherfuckers. You House niggas!"

"The devil is a motherfucking liar. So you know I ain’t worried, biotch."

"This is not a competition, it’s a cooperation you stupid ass house nigga."

"I don’t give a fuck what you think bitch."

So, it’s with great happiness that I offer to you the third installment in my on-going series of jack-assery: “Being black is the best.”

The Hottest Whips and Chicks at the 2006 Lowrider Tour

A week ago last Sunday I got to tape one of the coolest segments that I’ve been fortunate enough cover during my short tenure here at G4: The 2006 Lowrider Tour. The tour is put on by the preeminent car culture magazine in the world: Lowrider Magazine and surprisingly, the experience lived up to my expectations.

The 2006 Lowrider Tour is a nationwide event that’s been traveling around the country. While it’s set to conclude in October 8^th in Las Vegas, I got to visit the tour in not-so-lovely San Bernardino, CA. Holy shit! The tour consists of several components: there’s the requisite bikini contest, several “hop” contests, and more categories of show cars than I could count. While I expected to be most excited by the chicks, it was the hop contest that most impressed me. Seeing a car bounce to the extent that all four wheels are off the ground is amazing. Furthermore, while there were plenty of hot chicks, they looked so skanky that the idea of touching one of them was frightening. Just imagine a 40+ year-old woman in hot pants with a visible c-section scar and stretch marks throwing gang signs at my camera crew. Anyway, you can check out the segment that aired last week on G4’s “Attack of the Show” right here.

Motorola Pebl U6 ($299)

Earlier this week I wrote about the excitement that I felt after getting to play around with a couple of Motorola phones last week at CTIA in not-so-lovely Las Vegas: the SLVR (Cingular Wireless) and the PEBL (T-Mobile). Well, seeing as I'm like the man and shit, it didn't take me long to get my hands on them. Since most of you are familiar with the SLVR (it's basically the beautiful love child of the RAZR V3 and the ill-fated ROKR), I'm gonna write about the PEBL.

Let me start off by saying that I dig it. Which isn't to say that it's without fault. In fact, it's a great example of form before function. I was gonna say that it was “nearly the perfect representation of form before function,” but then I remembered the Nokia 7380 that i fawned over in this very blog. But I digress.

The PEBL is most definitely a sexy little phone (it even comes in a multitude of colors) that boasts full Bluetooth support, meaning it works with headsets but also for wireless data transfer: cool. If that's not enough, it also sports a speakerphone, is a world phone, and has built-in instant messaging (Yahoo, AOL, and ICQ). The PEBL has a WAP 2.0 browser that i found to be excruciatingly klugy and slow (I tested it in the Los Angeles area using T-Mobile as the service provider).

While the PEBL was obviously designed to turn heads, it leaves much to be desired on the hardware side. It has a relatively low-resolution VGA camera, the keypad, while cool-looking, can be tricky to use – especially if you're drunk, have big fingers, or worse: both, and it has 5MB of non-expandable memory. Oh wait! But I'm not done. The stylized external display only shows the time, battery life and shit like that and no caller-ID, while the internal display is a scant 1.8-inches. Weak!

Now, that I've criticized the shit out of the PEBL, you'd think that I wouldn't recommend it. On the contrary. With cell phones becoming more complicated, I'm beginning to think that having two phones (on the same plan) is a good idea. For instance, if you currently use a BlackBerry with T-Mobile, than the PEBL would be a great secondary phone for use during the evening and on weekends.

Product Pr0n: Bluetooth Headsets

This week's product segment could fall into two categories: Product Pr0n and part two of "Being Black is the Best!" Anyone who knows me personally knows that I, like all other technologically savvy black dudes, dig Bluetooth headsets. Of course, while they make sense for anyone who feels the need to talk on the phone while driving, they're kind of pointless if you're just walking around – and they're even more pointless if you're in a crowded place like a bar, restaurant or
nightclub.

Nevertheless, that hasn't stopped black dudes from rocking Bluetooth headsets like they were just another form of bling. Last fall I was hanging out at Ma'Kai, this upscale restaurant/nightspot in Santa Monica, when Eddie George walked in with a Motorola Bluetooth headset on his ear. Bluetooth headsets: justified. Furthermore, if you watched this year's NCAA tournament you would have noticed that in casual situations (whether out and about or eating) the black players pretty much all had Bluetooth headsets. Again: justified.

Hell, last year when I was still an editor at CNET I wrote a blog post called "Who says Bluetooth headsets aren't cool?" where I shared the story of how my boy TJ actually pulled some chicks at an SF nightclub cause his Bluetooth headset was blinking.

I'm not sure what it is, but I seriously can't see a hipster Hollywood white dude being able to pull it off. It's just too fucking ridiculous. That said though, it's the ridiculousness of Bluetooth
headsets that makes it cool for black dudes to rock em. I reiterate, "Being Black is the Best!"

Busta Rhymes Wildin Out!

I’ve always loved Busta Rhymes, but this shit takes the cake. Apparently Busta’s buddy Scott Storch was having a BBQ when some dumbass crashed his Ferrari into Storch’s house (read: rose bush). Busta takes the opportunity to document the scene calling it “Flipmode TV.” It’s one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen on YouTube. The best part is when the dude’s shorty chimes in. The whole scene is a great lesson in, “keeping your bitch in check.”

A few choice quotes:

"How the fuck do a Ferrari end up in a rose bush?"

“I hope your insurance is good. Biatch!”

Bootleg Mania!

In my quest to set the race back to the best of my abilities, I pitched, produced, and then aired the following segment. In a nutshell, I take three camcorders: the JVC Everio GZ-MG27, Canon's Elura 100 MiniDV, and the Toshiba Gigashot GSC-R30 30GB Hard Disk Camcorder. Nisa, please forgive me. But dear fans, I give you, Bootleg Mania!

Sometimes I really do love my job!

Last Friday I taped a segment where I got to use a model, Jen. Anyway, not only was Jen super-fucking-hot, cool, and easy to work with: she's smart too. Apparently she's finishing up her masters at USC. But enough about all that, this morning I found out that she's in the running for Maxim's Hometown Hotties. So, I urge you all to visit Maxim Online and vote for Jen.

Product Pr0n: iPod Accessories

I'm gonna start this off by keeping it real: I cannot stand the iPod or anything Apple-related. From a journalistic standpoint, dealing with Apple has been a nightmare ever since my days as a n00b technical editor at Ziff Davis' ComputerLife Magazine way back in 1997 (pour out a little liquor). Apple, like Sony, is one of those companies that's so hot that their hubristic attitude trickles down from the top of the organization down (I imagine that the cleaning people at their office in Cupertino think themselves too good to wipe urine off the bathroom floors). But i digress.

Anyway, in spite of my belief that the iPod is overrated, everyone keeps buying the thing. And because of this, there are a ton of cool iPod accessories. There's no justice. So, with that in mind take a peek at this week's Product Pr0n segment where I look at several pretty neat accessories for the iPod.

CTIA Wireless 2006

I just got back from CTIA Wireless 2006, the self-proclaimed "Most Important Technology Event of the Year." Aside from losing $300 at a Blackjack table ($300 that I most-definitely could not afford to lose) I came home having not really learned anything that I didn't already know. While the Motorola Q is one of the most exciting things I've seen in a long time; I'm starting to wonder if it will ever ship. Motorola's PEBL V6 too, is pretty hot. All that being said however, I'm writing this on the Cingular 8125 that I've had for months. So, what does this all mean? It means one thing: Asia fucking rules!